I’m out of town for work right now and found myself in need of something good to read. So I trapsed on over to the large book store right across from my hotel to see if I couldn’t solve my problem.

When I got there I headed straight for the Fantasy/Sci-Fi section. I ran into to very annoying problems. First, it seems that there aren’t any authors these days capable of writing just one book in a story line. No they have to write them in a series of three, or four, or five, or five hundred. As if this doesn’t add enough confusion, when I get to the book store, I can find book three in the series, and book five, and probably books eight and forty as well, but can I find book one?

No!!!

Next, and most alarming: vampire novels. I couldn’t swing a dead cat in that store without hitting a vampire novel or someone looking for a vampire novel. When did vampire novels qualify as fantasy/sci-fi? Did I miss that memo? I’ve been hearing about a new book on the Slice pod cast these past couple of weeks called “Brave Men Run” and went looking for it. I couldn’t find it anywhere. I did find a ton of vampire books. Every other book was a vampire book, but this new author was no where to be found.

I couldn’t believe what I was seeing so I went and asked an employee for help. When I mentioned the title, she looked at me with a puzzled, frightend look. “Is it a vampire book?” she asked. I told her that I surely hoped it wasn’t. “Well then we probably don’t have it,” was her reply. Then she added, “Uh… we don’t allow pets in here. Not even dead ones.” (Ok, I made up that conversation, but I think we can all imagine it happening.)

I realized that the fantasy/sci-fi section of this store was hopeless, but I didn’t give up hope. I’m a school teacher, and I’m planning to introduce a unit on historical fiction in my room this year. If I couldn’t find any good sci-fi, maybe I could find a few good titles to add to my classroom library. With this cheery thought in mind, I headed to the young adult section to see what Ann Rinaldi (awsome author) titles they might have on the shelves. When I arrived in the young adult section, I was shocked and dismayed to find only two Rinaldi titles on the shelves. But do you know how many vampire titles there were!?!?!?! Every third book was a #$$@#% vampire novel.

I couldn’t accept what I was seeing, so I found another employee. I begged him to show me more Rinaldi titles, or Sachar, or Spinelli, or anyone. “Do they write vampire novels?” he asked. My blank stare must have told him all he needed to know. “I’m very sorry,” He put a hand on my shoulder and I wiped tears of frustration from my eyes. “But if they don’t write vampire novels, we probably won’t carry them. Is that your cat? We don’t allow pets in here, not even dead ones” (Ok, that conversation didn’t happen either, but it could have.)

Exactly who decided that vampire novels are the next big thing!?!?!!? I’m sick of all things vampire. If I see another vampire book, I’m probably going to go crazy. I just can’t take it anymore!!!!

Thanks for listening to my rant. I’m all better now. Now if you’ll excuse me, my lovely wife has come to my rescue and sent me a book to read. She tells me that it’s a classic, so I’m sure it’s safe. It’s by some guy I’ve never heard of; I think his name is Stoker. Many I hope it’s not a vampire book.

Have a great one all,

Rich
(No dead cats were hurt in the writing of this post.)